I had only met the guy once. He was dating a girl I grew up with and she had introduced us in passing. I didn’t even know he worked out at my gym. Until now. I was in the locker room getting ready to hit the showers and no sooner had my boxers hit the floor than he comes bounding up to me to shake my hand and reintroduce himself. I didn’t even have time to grab a towel. He clearly didn’t either, as he was equally as buck nekkid as me. Awkward conversation ensues and lasts for a painfully long time. I don’t even remember his name or what we talked about. I just remember thinking, “If there were a set of rules for the showers, they should start with ‘Save the long conversations until pants are on.’”
Unspoken Gym Shower Etiquette:
- Save the long conversation until pants are on. This rule is especially helpful for those times when you run into a co-worker or your boss or your father-in-law in the shower. A simple “Hey!’ and a friendly jut of the chin their direction is enough until the man-junk is covered. The conversation won’t be nearly as forced. Remember, most guys are usually there to get clean, get dressed and get out. Aren’t you?
- Don’t be a space hog. There is limited space on the bench and at the sink. Don’t unpack your gym bag all over the bench so that I have to balance on one leg to put on my shoe. Don’t put your hair products and shaving gear so that I can’t use the sink next to you. We all need a little space.
- You’re not at home, so don’t act like it. I’ve been in gyms that have individual shower stalls with frosted glass doors, and ones that have stalls but no doors, and ones that have one big communal shower room. Whatever kind your gym has, remember, another guy will be standing in that exact spot a few minutes after you leave (just like the guy before you stood there) SO – Don’t pee on the floor. Don’t spit on the floor. Don’t shave in the shower. In other words, don’t leave anything on the shower floor that you wouldn’t mind stepping in from the guy who showered before you.
- Wear flip-flops into the shower. See #3.
- Take your time, but don’t take mine. You can relax in a hot shower. No problem. I enjoy that too, especially if there’s plenty of hot water. But not if there is a line of guys waiting to use the shower too. In that case get in, get wet, get clean and get out.
- Take your own soap and shampoo. Some gyms provide this. Others don’t. Either way, a bar of Dr. Squatch Pine Tar soap is a great way to end a workout. You don’t want to have to bum soap off of the guy next to you, do you?
Last modified: November 25, 2019